April 10, 2006

Donnie Mac's Parking Tix, Stevie's Mom, Dirk's Little Secret and More

Some thoughts from a random day in April:

-Big news from the day: It's been announced that according to DNA tests, Duke lacrosse players aren't tied to the rape of a stripper (yeah, we're starting out on a heavy note today). Perhaps it's just my resistance to front-page news, but am I the only one who doesn't really care that much about this story? Not to belittle what may or may not have happened and any suffering that may or may not have been caused, but I just don't find anything remotely redeeming to take away from this particular tale.

-Keeping it on a similar tip, I'm going to channel T.O. for a moment here and say this: Donovan, you're pathetic. Contesting a $256 fine for parking in a handicapped spot? How does this possibly make you look good? (McNabb and teammate Jeremiah Trotter were found guilty and ordered to pay fines). Whether or not you think you did it, you have more money than Joe Johnson (well, actually...you might have less than JJ, but you get the point) -- just pay the thing! The whole ordeal probably goes away and no one hears a peep of it. But by pleading not guilty all you do is call attention to the fact that your vehicle was parked in a handicapped spot, which is -- in a word -- not classy. I've gotten more parking tickets than Newman in my days on this earth, but this performance puts The White Whale to shame.

-On a similarly morbid note, but at least starting to transition towards the absurd: Steve Francis has likened the pain of the Knicks' season to the death of his mother. But then again, this is a man so dramatic he refused to play in Vancouver, which is by all accounts one of the great cities in the world. So I suppose we shouldn't take him too seriously. Whatever the case, good times in Knick land. At least Jamal Crawford is having fun.

-In a decidedly happier and more amusing piece of news, Dirk Nowitzki has a secret.

-And on an upbeat note I simply could not top if I tried, linked below is a video montage of people dunking on/swatting Shawn Bradley over the years. I particularly like the title: "Shawn Bradley, NBA Bitch." Well put. Was that a Robert Pack sighting? And better yet, I think I have found Ed O'Bannon's finest NBA moment. Now this is therapeutic.

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