August 08, 2007

Feeling Rather Chipper, Thank You

Last evening, approximately 13 brave souls set out on what some would classify as a death mission:

To go to Shea Stadium and rabidly cheer for Chipper Jones and the Braves, with each member of the group spelling out one letter of C-H-I-P-P-E-R'-S C-H-I-P-S in the upper deck.

Somehow, we survived. Here's what to know about what went down:

Upon entering the upper deck and walking across a sizable section of the stands, the reaction from the crowd was dramatic -- a chill-inducing smattering of boos, in part spurred on by the use of foam tomahawks and the matching t-shirts everyone in the group was wearing.

To get a sense of how loud that reaction was from the Mets fans, we actually walked to our seats in two different groups because of various concession purchases, etc. And when the second group was having a little bit of trouble finding its seats and one of the members was looking around confused, a random woman in a nearby seat said, "Your friends went that way."

Now some notes, by the numbers:

# of members of the group after we added three random Braves fans from Mississippi (one of whom for some unknown reason was wearing cut off jean shorts, loafers and ankle socks): 22

# of times that guy in jean shorts was called "gay" or some derivation thereof by surrounding Mets fans: 18

# of derisive comments about how backward the South is from angry Mets fans: 33

# of said comments that resulted in a long, drawn out exchange about the virtues of using carrier pigeons instead of cell phones that left one Mets fan rather perplexed and agitated: 1

# of beer bottles thrown at Chipper's Chips: 2

# of (completely full) water bottles thrown at Chipper's Chips: 1

# of peanuts thrown at Chipper's Chips: 3

# of Mets fans ejected for threatening members of Chipper's Chips: 12

# of Mets fans who escaped from security after being escorted out, leading the members of Chipper's Chips to think that they would be bludgeoned with lead pipes upon leaving Shea: 6

# of Braves runs: 7

# of Mets runs: 3

# of Chipper Jones hits: 3 (single, double, triple)

# of times security guard told us "Don't come back tomorrow": 1

# of references to The Warriors trying to get back to Coney Island as we rode the 7 Train back towards Manhattan: 14

# of whynattes consumed at the after party: 21

# of hours until we do it all over again:

23 and counting.


Blogger Jesse said...

Thank god Chipper got a few hits, and the Braves actually won.

1:20 PM, August 08, 2007  
Blogger Sam said...


If you wear cut-off jean shorts, you are gay.

11:17 PM, August 08, 2007  
Blogger Frank G Yak said...

Someplace ... deep deep deep in your soul I think you are a mets fan. I hope you get married and 4 daughters and a gay son named Oliver.

11:25 PM, August 09, 2007  
Blogger Justice Moustache said...

That's fucking fantastic. Good work by all of you

9:41 PM, August 12, 2007  
Blogger J.B. said...

splendid...where can i verify those numbers??? good work OCC!

11:24 PM, August 12, 2007  
Anonymous Jean Shorts Guy said...

first of all they're called jorts, not cut off's or jean shorts. haha.. thanks to chipper's chips...
# of crazy uneducated drunk blood thirsty met fans:29,988 (after they lost the twelve runaways.

# of chipper's chips: 22 (including us 3)

I like our odds guys

2:55 AM, August 15, 2007  

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