July 26, 2006

H.R., Howie and Broccoli Rabe

Remember that famous Chris Rock bit from "Bigger and Blacker" where he suggests that instead of gun control, what we really need is bullet control? To refresh your memory, he says: "if a bullet costs $5000 there'd be no more innocent bystanders. That'd be it. Every time someone gets shot, people will be like, 'Damn, he must have did something.'"

And it's exactly that line -- Damn, he must have did something -- that passed through The OCC's mind when news came down that ESPN canned baseball analyst Harold Reynolds this week. Because for the Worldwide Leader to come out firing (literally) at one of its most high-profile talents...well, quite simply -- he must have done (did) something. Right?

Or is it possible he didn't must have did something?

The something that Harold Reynolds is accused of, as you may have already heard, is sexual harassment. Which is a gray area that makes that spot on the back of Rasheed Wallace's head look like a completely normal patch of hair.

Here are The OCC's thoughts on this decidedly ambiguous matter:

1) Harold Reynolds is a good analyst. And by all accounts he comes across on air as a likeable guy. And, as Andrew Marchand of the New York Post points out in the article linked above, Reynolds is not the first on-air talent from ESPN to screw up. Yet many of those others got away with it, so why did he have to get whacked? Well, maybe he did something really serious, but if you believe H.R. (Harold Reynolds, not Human Resources), what he did in this case wasn't a big deal (Reynolds describes the incident that led to his firing as a misinterpreted hug). Let's hope that this transgression was bad enough to warrant the firing (something we'll probably never know for sure), or if it wasn't that bad, let's hope that ESPN realizes it overreacted and gets Harold back on the air soon. The guess here is we'll be seeing Harold back on the air at some other station in a lower-profile gig in the months to come. Hopefully he won't bottom out as far as "The Best Damn Sports Show, Period."

2) The OCC has heard from at least one source that Harold Reynolds clearly comes across as the flirtatious type but at the same time also appears to be completely harmless. Seems completely feasable that he just ended up flirting with the wrong person at the wrong time. Or that ESPN finally got tired of hearing the "Harold was flirting with me" complaints.

3) The OCC has seen Harold Reynolds' wife in person, and she is not an ugly lady. If memory serves correctly, she's gorgeous. What does this mean? Nothing really. Mainly just wanted to share that information.

4) Baseball Tonight is going to be a lot worse without Harold Reynolds. Too much John Kruk can be a very bad thing.

Some other thoughts from the world of sport:
  • As has happened before on this page with the likes of Josh Smith and Shaun Livingston, copious amounts of text shall now be devoted to extolling the virtues of one Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, California, USA infielder Howie Kendrick. This is by no means meant to be a claim to have discovered Kendrick, because many others have pimped him before (not in that way). Seriously, though, this guy is good. He was hitting .369 in the minors and has recently begun to get lots of AB's for the Angels. Flat out, he can hit. Just advised a friend to add him to his fantasy team and in his showcase at-bat which we watched on MLBTV.com (level of nerdiness -- very high), Howie hit a dinger. "Wow, that's unbelievable," said shocked friend. Unbelievable indeed. Don't hesitate. Get Howie Kendrick on your fantasy team. Trade some of your GI Joe's for his bobblehead doll. Make a whole bunch of t-shirts that say "Howie, Wowie!" and put them up on eBay. Actually, scratch that last idea -- but you get the point: It's high time to get on board this bandwagon.
  • On a note completely unrelated to sports, there are few things on this planet that can ruin the experience of eating a bagel early in the morning like looking across the train and seeing a small dog's dirty sphincter staring back in your face. Seriously, not cool at all. Put some trousers on that beagle!
  • And on the subject of food: There's a dude on the Twins who recently got called up, goes by the name of Josh Rabe. Do you suppose that's pronounced RAAB, as in broccoli rabe? Do you think Josh ever gets teased by teammates about his affiliation to broccoli's well-dressed step brother? Probably not. The guess here is that most Major Leaguers either a) think broccoli rabe is for sissies; or b) will not ever admit that they know what broccoli rabe is.

6 Comments:

Blogger jimmyrad said...

I actually was a semi-fan of HR. He definitely had his "Kruk-esque" moments, but he usually made a little sense in defending some of his opinions.

Baseball Tonight is just terrible right now. Steve Phillips truly is everything that is wrong with that network. He's a bigger buffoon than Kruk, in my opinion, because he has no idea he's a buffoon. Well, Kruk probably doesn't either.

5:53 PM, July 27, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

BEANTOWN!!!!!!

in other news, i didn't know kruk was on BT, perhaps that is bc i havent seen the show since '03. does he still have a permed mullet? does he have a spittoon nearby for commercial breaks? in kruk's best year, what would his fantasy value have been?

in other news, who is this jimmyrad character, and why is he so angry?

10:22 PM, July 27, 2006  
Anonymous Aimee Berg said...

Is this really the proper forum to be discussing gun control?

11:12 AM, July 28, 2006  
Blogger jimmyrad said...

I'm very envious of anyone that hasn't watched BT since 2003. It is wretched these days. At least the "Steve Phillips Press Conferences" supplied copious amounts of unintential comedy material.

To answer the poster question. I am angry when BT is brought up bc Steve Phillips is on it and has a job. Not only that, but everytime they show a highlight of David Wright, Karl Ravech gets down on his knees, unzips Steve's pants, and rhetorically asks, "Who drafted David Wright?" Everyone on there is straight flotsam.

4:08 PM, July 28, 2006  
Anonymous Hank said...

Huh... I had been wondering what happened to Harold Reynolds. Without question, he was my favorite guy on that set. Good analysis, funny guy, etc. I'll miss watching him.

7:04 PM, August 10, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Harold and Kelley (his wife) and their daughter live down the street from us and they are a really nice couple. They're out walking with the baby a lot, and he just took in his SIL and her husband to live with them for a little while, and hosted his SIL's wedding at the house.

He's broadcasting from his house for some internet company about the World Series - anyone know where he's appearing?

Nice guy, but in my experience, even the nicest guys (with the nicest, hottest wives) can be creeps. He has a bit of a reputation from his ball-playing days.

11:28 PM, October 09, 2007  

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