December 26, 2006

Here's a Little Storey that Must Be Told

There are a number of ways to make a name for yourself in pro sports.

One such way is to simply have an unusual name, such as Gheorghe Mhuresan. Of course, it helped for Mhuresan that he was freakishly tall, could actually play a little bit and appeared in one of the classic pieces of 20th Century American cinema (My Giant).

For those who aren’t so lucky to have Mhuresan's intrinsic star power, the most universally successful way to get recognition is to simply let your actions define you.

And whether he meant to do so or not, former Washington Wizard Awvee Storey has recently taken this philosophy to the extreme by punching NBDL teammate Martynas Andriuskevicius in the head during practice, putting the 7-2 Lithuanian in the hospital with a skull fracture, among other things.

Storey’s agent, Mark Bartelstein, told the Chicago Sun-Times that “Awvee’s a terrific kid.” But for most people, to whom Storey is more or less a complete stranger, this brutal punch will most likely be his enduring legacy.

However, readers of this site may recall Awvee Storey’s name for another reason – namely, because he’s good friends with a certain extremely likable lunatic by the name of Gilbert Arenas.

Remember Storey now? He first surfaced on our radar earlier this year, when Arenas got into trouble for disobeying police officers during a traffic incident. Turns out that Storey was blocking traffic, and Arenas came to help him out.

And the Storey legend added another compelling chapter in October, when thanks to a brilliantly-written Esquire magazine piece, we learned that Arenas loves to “wrastle,” and frequently has done so with Storey as his sparring partner. And when the two of them brawl, apparently nothing’s off limits, including biting, stomach punching, and one occasion on which Storey pinched Arenas’ nose until it was bruised purple and called him "Rudolph."

So while a single fateful punch may come to define Storey's career, it’s important that we make sure not to forget the other (relatively) non-violent things he’s done to distinguish himself as a noteworthy (if not certifiably loopy) S.O.B.

And without condoning his recently-thrown punch, let this much be said in Storey's defense: Any friend of Gilbert Arenas is a friend of ours.


Post a Comment

<< Home