He Who Must Not Be Named

I can’t help but think that chiming in on this topic is about as constructive as lobbing a thermos full of kerosene into a raging brushfire, but I have to speak up with my thoughts on the Terrell Owens situation nonetheless, quite simply because I can’t take it any longer.

My main question is why. Why are we wasting so much time on this saga? Why must I flip on SportsCenter (seemingly less-watchable every day, by the way) to see that T.O. is the lead story? Why must I go to the Worldwide Leader’s website – my primary source for important sports headlines, quite simply because there isn’t significant competition – and see the latest on the Owens situation, today’s story being that he reported to training camp, emblazoned on the front page?

Honestly, it’s just not that compelling of a story. Basically, this guy is an incredibly talented receiver who is a notoriously bad teammate and by most accounts just an all-around bad guy who is whining because he thinks he’s underpaid. What’s interesting about that? Who do you sympathize with in this story, other than Owens’ millionaire teammates who he’s pissing off with his ridiculous behavior? What outcome – other than T.O. being released by the fed-up Eagles, which isn’t going to happen – can you root for?

The fact is, this is not a good story because Terrell Owens isn’t a worthy villain. You know how in some movies it’s just too easy to hate a character – when the writers and director try so hard to make him a villain that every scene he has in the movie is just completely unpleasant? That’s what this story is like right now. Because let’s face it – T.O.’s only tangibly redeeming quality is his ability to perform on the football field. And this is the preseason, so there’s not exactly a lot of that going on. It’s just plain irritating, and I wish sportswriters across the country would just stop giving this clown attention so he’d shut his mouth (which he would never do anyway, but at least they could stop directly enabling it).

But look at me – now I’m doing exactly what I didn’t want to do. I’ve gotten all fired up about this thing and wasted my energy on it, and now I’m part of the problem. I feel like the guy who turns around and scolds someone in a movie theater to be quiet, but in the process ends up being louder than the other talker was being in the first place. Great.
--------------------

A few other thoughts on my mind on this mid-August Wednesday:

-Looks like the much-anticipated Joe Johnson to the Hawks trade could go through later this week now that NBA Commish David Stern has approved the Hawks’ ownership group’s efforts to oust resident buzzkill Steve Belkin as the team’s governor (thereby removing Belkin’s right to have the final say on all of the team’s trades, which is what was holding up the Johnson deal in the first place). All merits and flaws of the deal aside, I have to say I’m kind of surprised that Stern stepped in and agreed to pave the way for the other owners to oust Belkin. I kind of thought the Commish would take the tack of “This is your problem, you pathetic children. Work it out amongst yourselves.” But it appears Stern must have been so eager to put an end to the embarrassing bickering among the ownership group that he decided to take control of the situation. That’s the only logical guess I can come up with.

-SI just put out its All-25-and-Under baseball squad, and I’m sorry for being a poopy-pants, but I just don’t believe that Albert Pujols is 25 years old.

-File this under “Remarkable and Underappreciated Feats of Athleticism and Coordination in Everyday Life”: Heading across 125th street on my way to the subway after work today I saw a woman breast-feeding her rather sizable infant while walking – at a fairly brisk pace, mind you – down the crowded sidewalk.